Post of General Awesomeness

Soundtrack.


Marching to the playoffs.


Inevitable afterglow.


Half-arsed photoshop.


Pop-culture reference.


Fandom.


Joe Thornton named NHL's First Star of The Week.


Sharks ranked first in THN's Power Rankings.


Gary Coleman likes what he sees here.

Happy Birthday

Mr. Hockey turns 80 today. Send some positive vibes through the airwaves for a legend.

Sharks Game Day: Holy Shnikeys We Have A Game In An Hour!

Phoenix Coyotes (37-35-6) @ San Jose Sharks (47-21-10)

I'll be live blogging which is probably the only reason this game is getting a post. This is pretty much a meaningless game- gear up for the playoffs and stay healthy. Just got home after a long spring break, this week will be chock full with hockey hooliganry.

Prediction: Sharks win. By like 4 or something. Whatevs.

UPDATE: If the Sharks win tonight they clinch the second seed in the NHL. This means (Lord Stanley willing) that in the Stanley Cup Finals they would have home-ice advantage.

Good Times.

Good times.

Sharks Gameday: Puck The Ducks

Team Teal (46-21-10) @ The Quack Crew (44-26-8)

Palm trees? Ummm this is hockey boys, not a new episode of The OC

As is the generally accepted rule with Sharks-fans, I loathe the Anaheim Ducks. Here's a short list of reasons why:

1) They play down the coast. I go to a school where it's 49% Nor-Cal, 49% So-Cal, and 2% out-of-staters. Don't think for a second I'm unaware of the rivalry surrounding the two zones of California.
2) The Ducks are usually fighting for the Pacific Division title along with the Sharks. Therefore most of the games played against them are meaningful. Throw in some booze (a necessity of fandom), and you've got some passionate people.
3) The Ducks won a Stanley Cup last year (those bastards....)
4) The Honda Center (see above).
5) Chris Pronger is an asshole.
6) Teemu Selanne played for the Sharks and sucked, then he goes back to Anaheim after the lockout and resurrects his career.
7) They are the dirtiest team in the league besides the Flyers. This is an opinion. This is a blog. I get paid don't get paid to make these brash statements.
8) A duck does not intimidate me. I've never heard of someone dying from a Duck attack. But a Shark? They made a movie about this. It's pretty famous too.
9) They won a Cup?!?!?! Arghhhhh!
10) And now this.

I was at the game. One minute left, Anaheim had failed to put a shot on net in the third, so Kunitz decides to go Chuck Norris on Cheech's head. This is one of those things that if Cheech shakes it off and plays the next day, I don't blink or raise too much of a stink. But he didn't play the next day. If you look at the replay (there is a link in the link that I linked...whoa, that's a little confusing. Just look for it following the first paragraph in the article) you see Kunitz bring his stick up high and catch Cheech in the back of the head. He also throws an elbow in for good measure. At no point in the replay do I see Kunitz go for the body- he deliberately goes after Cheechoo's head.

Not classy. Fuck you Kunitz.


So with Cheechoo banged up from that, fully expect Jody Shelley to play an enforcer role tonight. In fact if he doesn't do something in the first period I'll be surprised, and a little peeved. I'm starting to sound like Don Cherry now (look at that nifty sportcoat!), but things like this have to be dealt with. A scrap with Parros in the first. Settle the score, and we play some legitimate physical hockey from there on. Here's an excerpt of the Sharks pregame show (before the Phoenix game):

Shelley: Either the NHL polices it, or we will.

Baker: Don’t go after Kunutz, go after Beauchemin. (Baker’s reason:) He plays more minutes and if he’s out, it hurts them more than taking Kunitz out.

Dan: The views expressed by Jamie Baker are not the views of the San Jose Sharks or the NHL.

Jamie oh Jamie. Sign him up. I half expect him to suit up down in Anaheim and crush one of the Ducks into next week. As for Shelley, good for him. He realizes Colin Campbell isn't going to do anything in terms of suspending an Anaheim player this close to the playoffs (ratings anyone?), so Shelley will take matters into his own hands.

Phew. On to the game.

This is going to be a good one. Two stellar teams tuning up for the postseason. I can't wait. I'll be at The Pond tonight with some buddies, probably being a jerk of some sort in the nosebleeds, alongside all you other jerks in the nosebleeds. Giguere is still out (EDIT: Giguere will be a game-time decision), but Hiller played extremely well against us last time so don’t expect a drop off in talent in Anaheim’s crease. Pronger and Perry are also scratched, Getzlaf as well. This Ducks team is a little depleted, but a win’s a win’s a win (is that how the saying goes?).

Prediction: Sharks win 2-0. Goals by Thornton and Patty. Chris Kunitz thinks he is trying out for American Gladiators and attempts to lop off Cheechoo’s head again plays a solid game, but is held scoreless along with the Quack Crew.

Go Sharks.

Sharks Gameday: The Falling Stars

Dallas Stars (42-29-5) @ San Jose Sharks (45-21-10)



As the Count expertly notes, this post is brought to you by the magic number five. I mentioned this before, the division's fate is in our hands. It's up to the Sharks to take it.

As for the Phoenix game, Los Tiburones sleptwalk through it. These types of performances are excusable towards the end of the year when the grind begins to set in (especially after the current streak San Jose has put up), but can't be afforded tonight and tomorrow (in Anaheim). Two playoff teams in two days. We'll see what the boys are made of.

Dallas comes into town tonight playing some terrible hockey. In the month of March they have gone 1-7-0. Two points in 26 days! Yikes. The Battle of California has an excellent in-depth article on the subject:

Have The Playoffs Started?

Or is Marty Turco imploding early this year?

I think it's subtlety really gets the point across.

Regardless, this is still a team to fear come playoff time, provided they don't do their usual early-exit routine. With the addition of Brad Richards, Dallas is a squad that has the potential to do some damage. They may be slumping now, but all it takes is a big hit, save, or goal, and this team could get rolling again.

Mike Modano and JR in San Jose tonight, two of the best American-born players of all time. Modano has 526 career goals, while JR has banged the twine 508 times. They both got their five-hundredth this year.

A big key to this game will be to get on Dallas early in the first. If The Tank gets rocking, there ain't no stopping.

Prediction: Sharks win 3-2. Goals by Jeremy Roenick, Mr. Roenick, and JR.

The (Kind of But Not Really) Twilight Zone Post

So this is the Twilight Zone post. Turn on some "Explosions In The Sky", sit back, and let me explain the direct correlation between We Bleed Teal (that link is really unnecessary) and Team Teal.

Sunday March 16th.... Fernando Pisani is featured on a Knob Hockey Youtubular in the game day preview. Pisani scores the game winner in the shootout to end the Sharks 11 game winning streak.

Wednesday March 19th.... In the prediction part of the article, I say the Minnesota Wild will tie the game with 30 seconds left off of shot that hits Alexei Semenov's skate. Semenov is not on the ice, but the Wild tie it with 30 seconds left in the third. Sharks go on to win it in the shootout.

Friday March 21st.... Richard Simmons is featured on a FunPhoto at the beginning of the post. I sit next to a guy at the game who looks exactly like Simmons. Well, if Simmons blew off the gym and spent his time watching One Tree Hill and posting on a blog. But I digress. Sharks win in regulation 2-1.

Tuesday March 25th.... I spend roughly seventeen minutes on a half-assed post, the same amount of time the Sharks spend playing decent hockey in Phoenix. Sharks lose in overtime 5-4.


Hmmmm.

Sharks Game Day: Quick and To The Point

San Jose Sharks (45-21-9) @ Phoenix Coyotes (36-34-6)

In the first three meetings between these teams, San Jose outscored the 'Yotes 15-1. That's pretty insane. But then The Great One and the brains upstairs picked Illya Bryzgalov off waivers from the Ducks, and the bottom feeding Coyotes suddenly had playoff dreams. Although they've hit a skid lately (5 losses in a row), and are no longer in the hunt for the postseason, this team is going to be pretty good in the years to come.

Stanley Cup Finals 2011: Washington Capitals vs. Phoenix Coyotes. Quote me boys.

San Jose has mustered a 1-1-1 record against Phoenix after Illya was required, making this game not the cakewalk it would have been earlier in the year. The Sharks have been playing low-scoring hockey, which gets me excited for their chances come playoff time. The more comfortable you are in a one-goal game the easier the transition into the playoffs will be. That's all I got for this one, spring break's clutches still have me under wraps. Expect more later in the week.

Magic number is six, San Jose could do a lot tonight with a win. I'll post some comments either during or after the game in the comments section, feel free to chime in.

Prediction: Sharks win 4-2. Goals by JR (x2), Pavelski, and Mitchell.

This Is Quite Past Due & The Magic Number 6

So I know this happened in '95 and it really doesn't relate to the Sharks, but I figured after the big win Friday night it would be worth it. Here's Wild Wing (the Anaheim Ducks mascot) attempting to do his best Evel Knievel impersonation, failing, and then flailing in the flames of defeat.



'Yotes on Tuesday. Sorry for the lack of posts, spring break (and a Sharks break) have kept me out of my respectable, albeit somewhat lonely, posting cave. My friend saw Gooch, Rismiller, Murray, and Campbell at a bar in San Jose after the game, he's in the process of emailing me the pics. I'll update them on this post when I get them.

As for the Pacific, the Sharks are looking strong in their bid to obtain the second seed in the playoffs. Dallas is all but an afterthought (they might even be mathematically eliminated) and the Ducks are five points back with two more games played. Here's my fifth-grade number crunch as we gear up for the playoffs.

Anaheim Ducks: Five games remaining, ten possible points. 94 + 10 = 104 total possible
Team Teal: Seven games remaining, fourteen possible points. 99 + 14 = 113 total possible

Assuming Anaheim wins out (including next Friday against the Sharks), San Jose would need six points to clinch the division outright. There's too many factors in the tiebreaker for me to attempt to wrap my alcohol-addled brain around (wins, points against one another etc.), so we're calling the magic number six. With each Ducks loss in regulation that number drops 2, an overtime loss 1. Same goes for the Sharks- win drops it 2, OT loss 1. That looks pretty damn good.

As a side note, Los Tiburones de San Jose are 12-0-1 since acquiring Brian Campbell, which is a fun stat to stare at. He has posted 2 goals, 11 assists, and a +8 plus/minus ratio in that span.

My friend who shall remain nameless (Sourav Roy, he attends UC Irvine, please make the world a brighter place and send him packages filled with burnt elephant feces) said it was "weak" I didn't write a post about my experience at the game.

It's pretty hard to take him seriously considering his peg leg and hands shaped like asterisks, but I respect him enough to give it a shot. Here's a list of observations.

1) The early goal really got the crowd going, Joe made a heads up play to make Hiller and the defenseman (Niedermayer I believe, could be wrong) bite and vacate the crease. Count it, Sharks up one.
2) Jody Shelley and George Parros rumbled in the first, which is always a treat to watch. Parros' moustache is top of the line, something that cannot be said for Mr. Browntown up there.
3) The Ducks goal was a beaut, Kunitz laid out a great pass for Marchant. Nabby looked a little over-agressive coming out of his crease, but hey what can you do. Prettiest play of the game.
4) The Sharks first 5 on 3 power play was atrocious. Aight boys, kick it up top to Campbell, deliver it to Thornton on the right wing. Joe, pray a little bit, and send a hard pass into the slot. The Ducks defense will break it up. Rinse and repeat.
5) The Ducks netminder Hiller played out of his mind. He deserved a top three star.
6) I always love it when JR scores. His interview after the game was priceless as always. The bug eyed look is really his thing.
7) No shots on net in the third for the Ducks looked great on paper, but it didn't feel that way being there. It wasn't as bad as the zero shot stat indicates, but ku-freaking-dos to the Sharks for holding the fort. That's something to hang your hat on.
7.5) The Sharks seemed to whiff on a lot of their one-timers in the slot, but that could be attributed to the Ducks D. Whatevs.
8) Ten minutes left in the third, let's play dip and dunk with the puck. Typical Sharks-fare with the lead at the end of the game, but hey it's working so I'm not complaining.
9) Kyle McClaren looked like a hungover Furby out there. I realize his knee is bothering him and he's still getting into the swing of things, but I pooped my pants a little bit everytime he touched the puck in our defensive zone. Turnovers, trouble clearing the puck, a non-factor in the breakout....eh. Pick it up Kyle, we're going to need you come playoff time.
10) The food was slightly better than the cardboard I eat down at school, but pricy as always. Nothing new though.
11) There were some guys dressed up in Duck Hunting outfits, camo and all. Reminded me of some lame frat party. At least come with the SNES orange gun from the game or something.
12) I sat next to a season ticket holder that looked just like Richard Simmons, which is weird considering I included him in my gameday post. After a sweaty high five (following Joe's goal) I decided to ignore him. When JR scored, and he turned around yelling something about a goal being scored, his abnormally large mouth gave me a view into his intestinal tract. I noticed he had a point. A goal had been scored. Good guy.
13) It felt great to be at The Tank again. What an atmosphere.
14) We won. And we beat the Ducks. Good times.
15) It seems like there needs to be at least fifteen of these things.
16) But whatevs.

Sharks Gameday: Bada Boo Wa

Anaheim Ducks (42-25-8) @ San Jose Sharks (44-21-9)

I'm on spring break.



Which means I'm not wasting any time at the beach partying with my celebrity friends. Ima be at The Tank (Section 205, Row 16. Look for the guy with the nosebleed). Probably the biggest Sharks game thus far this year.

We are rolling right now. Patty has been playing out of his mind. Nabokov looks like Patrick Roy fresh off a cocaine binge. This game is huge because the Sharks have a chance to put the icing on the cake in the Pacific. Let me put it this way......

Los Tiburones are preparing for their Friday night party with The Quacks. The cake is in the oven. JR's got his oven mitts on, and Big Joe is working on getting the icing just the right color teal. Marcel Goc is trying in vain to set up a playlist on his iPod for the party. Marleau is mumbling something about working hard. Ron Wilson is frantically going back and forth on whether to serve orange juice, champagne, or just switch em halfway through. He doesn't really know what the hell he's doing. Alexei Semenov is at home playing solitaire. Douglas Murray is in the bathroom cranking his shaft. His nickname is Crankshaft. Terrible play on words. I should delete that.


The Tank is rocking.

Seven points is a big lead with seven games left and a game in hand. Three is pretty slim, and frankly I don't want the Sharks to be playing for the division title on the last game of the year in Dallas. Four point swing. Let's do this boys.

Prediction: Sharks win 2-0. Goals by Thornton and Patty (the big guns come out firing tonight). Chris Pronger delivers a roundhouse kick to JR's groin after the final whistle sits silent as a lamb in the locker room.

Editor's Note: Miss Rose and I will be lugging around these bad boys at the game tomorrow night. Credit goes to her for the idea. She's an art student. Yeah, one of those people.

Sharks Gameday: A Little Personal History

Minnesota Wild (39-26-8) @ San Jose Sharks (43-21-9)



Scott Mellanby has an excellent idea for increasing scoring in the NHL. I don't really feel the league needs to make a move in regard to goal-scoring, but this is something I wouldn't mind. If the brass decide to do anything, this better be it.

I was born in St. Paul, Minnesota and my dad was a pretty big Minnesota North Stars fan. This was my first introduction to hockey. After the games we would go down into the basement and practice my goaltending skills. I would tie pillows to my legs with two pillows for the pads, use my baseball mitt as a glove, use our laundry bin as the net, and my pops would fire a plastic puck at me while I attempted to do my best Patrick Roy impersonation. Then the Minnesota North Stars moved to Dallas, I moved to the Bay Area, and the San Jose Sharks moved into my vacant hockey heart.

The Wild come into San Jose tonight off a big 2-1 win over division-rival Colorado on Monday night. The Wild don't really scare me too much. Marian Gaborik can score some goals and Brian Rolston is knocking on the door for thirty on the year, but they prefer to play a low-scoring game. San Jose is the same way, so expect a defensive minded game at The Tank.

Five points up on Anaheim, six on Dallas, with a game in hand on both squads. They play eachother tommorow night so somebody's picking up two points. We're in good position heading into the stretch drive if we win this one. Let's go tame the Wild.

Prediction: Sharks win 2-1. San Jose leads with under 30 seconds remaining, but Alexei Semenov (who managed to crack the line-up for reasons unknown) puts one past Nabokov into his own net. Coincidentally, his choice for the Calder Trophy is Niklas Backstrom.

Redemption comes in the shootout however, when Ron Wilson elects to have Semenov shoot in the final round to clinch the game (TSN later reports Wilson managed to down a fifth of Bacardi before the opening faceoff). Gliding casually down to the net, Semenov hits a rough patch in the ice, falls on his stomach, and manages to headbutt the puck in for the game winner.

This Is What Happens When You Get Traded From The Sharks

Ouch.

I wonder if they worked on this during practice last year.

This Is The Post Where I Vilify Versus

The East Coast Bias is nothing new in American sports. ESPN's headuarters is in Bristol, Connecticut. Unfortunately ESPN has very little to do with the NHL nowadays. Thanks a bunch Gary Buttman (ah, how clever). But the rest of professional sports world in the Red, White, and Blue are affected by this on a much larger scale. A big part of it has to do with revenue. Obviously big cities like New York, Philadelphia, and Boston are going to pull in more greenbacks for companies when given TV coverage, compared to a city like San Jose.

The Versus NHL schedule reflects this bias to a "T". I've done the math, and here is what it comes out to:

Games with Two Western Conference Teams: 19
Games with Two Eastern Conference Teams: 31
Games with Teams From Both Conferences: 5
One Game TBD

Now this wouldn't be a problem for me if I thought the talent in the East was vastly superior to the West. But it's not superior; in fact, you could make a case that the West (top to bottom) is a much more competitive Conference. The West's record against the East this year (as of 3/16/08)? 81-51-14. That's pretty significant, no? The West is also much more physical night in, night out. The Eastern Conference generally looks like a slew of 12-year old forwards slicing through the defense as if they were running a cone drill. Anyday now I expect to see Scott Hamilton manning the Thrashers blueline.



Of course there are exceptions to this. New Jersey, Montreal, Pittsburgh, Ottawa, and the New York Rangers are Cup-contending teams with a ton of talent. What I'm saying is not that the East is a bunch of jobbers, but that I would be more confident about playing any of those teams in a seven-game series when compared to the option of Detroit, Anaheim, Dallas, or Calgary. And the Sharks will most likely have to take out at least two of those teams to reach the Finals.

Now on to Versus. The Versus schedule, regardless of the East Coast Bias, is deplorable at best. I'm not exactly sure if there are contract issues at work here (correct me if there are), but two lousy games a week on a Monday and Tuesday is not what I'm looking for when it comes to the flagship station of the NHL. If the NHL wants to start building a bigger fan base south of the Canadien border (and it seems they feel the best way to do this is through Versus; pay attention to the "confident" quotes by Bill Daly throughout the article, especially at the end. Those italics are there for a reason people), start by cutting bull riding and fishing. And Brian Engblom's mullet. (I'm kidding, that's probably half the fun of watching their coverage). 56 measly games a year just isn't doing it for me.

Alright, the siren song of procrastination has had me under it's sweet spell for long enough. Time to see the sun.

Sharks Game Day: California Dreamin'

San Jose Sharks (42-21-9) @ Los Angeles Kings (28-39-6)



Los Angeles is dreaming of the first pick in the NHL draft (a.k.a. The Steven Stamkos Sweepstakes).
San Jose is dreaming of a division title.

All is right with the world.

If there is such a thing as a "good" loss, Sunday night was it. Sometimes a goaltender can just take over a game, and unfortunately last night was that kind of night for Roloson. In two days (Edmonton was in Phoenix the night before) he made 86 stops. That's a 96.6% save percentage. Pretty darn good for a 39 year old.

The Sharks are picking up points like Eliot Spitzer picks up prostitutes. The franchise-record eleven game winning streak has come to an end, but San Jose brings their league best road record (25-8-3) and a nine-game road winning streak into this one. Playing Dallas or Anaheim first round is not something I'm really jumping at the bit to do. Which makes two points against the worst team in the league fairly neccesary. I've attended two Sharks games at Staples Center over the years, and can't say I really like the atmosphere all too much. The fans were filing in halfway through the first period (to be fair, I think that might be an LA thing). Which probably beats this year, where fans are likely to be filing out halfway through the opening twenty.

The Kings have actually played pretty well against the Sharks this season, as San Jose has only managed to post a 2-2-1 record against them. But San Jose is solid on the road. Let's make tonight the third straight win in the Staples Center (Sharks are 2-0-0 in LA this season).

I'll be able to watch this one on the tube tonight with my trusty Natty light by my side. Odds are I will be live blogging in the comments section below during the game. Please forgive my inability to spell korrectli as the game moves on, sometimes drink makes it hard 2 think.

Prediction: Sharks win 3-1. Goals by Michalek, Rivet, and Pavelski.

Go Sharks.

Sharks Game Day: Oiling Up For The Big (Playoff) Drive

Edmonton Oilers (35-32-5) @ San Jose Sharks (currently pwning noobs)



EH PISANIIIIII!!!
Ah, that made me giggle. And we move on....

Fairly new to the blogosphere, I decided to check out Covered In Oil to see what they were saying about the Sharks. Not much in fact. Turns out, they possess a vehement dislike for Brian Burke (GM of the Anaheim Ducks) that makes me fear for the life of his children if he ever decided to take the family up to Edmonton. The whole screw Brian Burke thing seems a bit over the top to me (although very amusing). I guess the difference is that the Sharks are in a tight race to win their division, and the Oilers are fighting to stay out of the Northwest cellar. I'd probably be preaching the same thing if I was in their shoes winter boots.

San Jose needs to pick up a win tonight in order to establish a lead in the Pacific before they face the Ducks and Stars (twice each) in the last ten games of the year. With three games in hand, and a two point lead over Anaheim, a win tonight would go a long way. I'll be on my couch with the trusty headphones for this one, and posting on the comment board during the game.

Prediction: Sharks win 4-3. Goals by Cheech (x2), Pavelski, and Grier.

Go Sharks.

Ed. Note: "Oiling up for the big playoff drive" may be a little homoerotic, but it was the best descriptor I could think of. I guess I'm going to have to work on those.

Sharks Off-Day; Pronger's Suspension

It's an off day for San Jose, which means I'm devouring a Carl's Jr hamburger in my underwear while watching Robot Chicken reruns and doing the occasional jumping jack. Gotta get your cardio in. In the midst of this I decided to reflect a little on the current state of Los Tiburones with some much belated trade analysis, and a little Pronger commentary thrown in for good measure.

First off, it's great to see Ron Wilson sticking with roughly the same lines as of late. He has seemed to find the right combination, and it appears that the circus days of line-juggling are behind us. Bad for the manufacturers of Xanax, good for me.


Jody Shelley: The Sharks haven't had a big-time enforcer since Scott Parker was shipped to Colorado for a late round draft pick in 2007. At the beginning of this year, the toughness of the Sharks was called into question on a nightly basis, and rightfully so. Players like Milan Michalek and Jonathan Cheechoo were getting bounced around, and no one (besides Douglas Murray) seemed really willing to do anything about it. When Shelley came over, the general consensus was that it was a decent move for San Jose (add some brawn and beef), but that Shelley wouldn't be cracking the line-up too often on a team with as many talented forwards as San Jose.

Well Shelley has proved us wrong. It seems he's in the lineup to stay (at least until Ryan Clowe comes back from his ACL injury, if he ever does), working primarily with Goc and Plihal on the fourth line. Now you'll see guys giving it back when they feel they have been roughed up a little too much, knowing that they have a more than capable enforcer lurking around the corner. And the team as a whole seems to be getting roughed up less and less because of the very same reason. Has Jody Shelley put this team onto his shoulders and carried them? No, not at all. But has he added a component to the Sharks that was lacking, and is necessary in a long playoff run? The answer is yes.

Conclusion: The media guide typically lists players a couple inches taller and a few pounds heavier than they really are. Shelley has turned that media guide into reality.


Brian Campbell: The Sharks are 9-0 since acquiring Campbell from Buffalo, for Steve Bernier and a first round pick. This trade immediately made the Sharks blueline immensely better. First off, Alexei Semenov now rides the bench. That in itself is a blessing. In fact, if we had just shipped Semenov out of town and gotten some stale cereal in return I would have labeled the trade deadline as a success. With Campbell you get one of the best defenseman in the game, who can move the puck up the ice quickly and efficiently. The sometimes stagnant power play also improves. Combined with Thornton's vision on the ice and Campbell's ability to find the open man, the man-advantage is generating a barrage of scoring chances. And let's not forget that he can score some pretty sweet goals and deliver some vicious hits while he's at it.

There's been some worries that Campbell may just be a rental player for this year's playoff push (his contract expires at the end of the year), and that come the offseason, he'll land a lucrative deal with a team other than San Jose. I'm going to go on record here and say that Brian Campbell re-signs with the Sharks after the season. He's been living with Joe Thornton (who he knew growing up in Ontario). As we all know, Big Joe decided to stick around after being traded to the Sharks (along with Craig Rivet among others). The weather is great, the team is young, talented, still improving, and The Tank is one of the best places to play in the NHL.... I know I'm biased, but it seems as if San Jose is a perfect fit for Campbell.

Conclusion: This one is a no-brainer. Campbell has effectively turned the Sharks from an underachieving team into a serious Cup contender in the Wild West.

*************************************************************************************


In other news, Goonmeister Extraordinaire Chris Pronger of the Anaheim Ducks has been suspended for eight games after some uncharacteristic dirty play (Ryan Kesler of the Vancouver Canucks was his latest victim). Here's my take on Pronger. The guy's a complete asshole with a lot of talent. I can't stand the Ducks in general, and having that maniac out there wearing the "C" doesn't warm me up too much. His elbow seems to have a penchant for eardrums, and now it seems as if he's watched "Happy Feet" with his kids one time too many. Mike Chen has an article on the matter over at his hockey blog. It's much more concise and coherent, something I am unfortunately unable to do when it comes to Pronger.

My analysis? Pronger got what was coming to him. I don't agree with the NHL flipping their stance on whether or not to suspend him in a matter of 24 hours, but the fact remains that he has been getting away with dirty play for awhile now. It's nice to see some karma. Eight games is a legitimate suspension (this is nowhere near the severity of Chris Simon's stomp on Jarkko Ruutu that got Simon 30 games), and suspending Pronger for even one game of the playoffs would have been ridiculous. The Anaheim Ducks will make the playoffs, and remain a threat to the Sharks chance at a Stanley Cup.

Blood on Their Hands

As i listen to the song "Blood on My Hands" by Iced Earth, repeating in my head over and over again, all I have to say is that the Sharks have taken it to a new level this year. If there is blood on anyones hands it must be the Sharks. They have grabbed, strangled, and killed anything in its path over the last eleven games. This team is destined for the inevitable. Since '98 and even the '99 season they have been pushing toward the ultimate goal of a Stanley Cup. It is now the year 2008, and they have the best chance they have ever seen, and might ever possibly see, to compete for a Cup. You must not take anything for granted and if you ask me the Sharks have a chance, a destiny, to take home the Stanley Cup this year. Cheechoo is PROVEN (to say the least) as a late season scorer, and if Patty can continue his playoff dominance that he has portrayed in the past (20 goals in the last three playoff years, tied with Jarome Iginla for the most in that span), the Sharks are the team with the best shot at winning the Stanley Cup this year. Let us not even mention the fact that Evgeni Nabokov is our goaltender.

Yeah thats what i thought.

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Please email Jason Plank at (jasonplank@umail.ucsb.edu) for more information regarding opportunities to expand your business.

Cheers,
Jason Plank
Author of We Bleed Teal

Who We Are

The problem with being a college student at UC Santa Barbara has nothing to do with the weather or the scandalous co-eds, but the fact that my hockey coverage consists of a steady dose of the much-loathed Anaheim Ducks, and the lousy Los Angeles Kings. Sadly my thirst for hockey has resulted in many a lonely night cuddled up to a 30-pack of Natty Light to watch Chris Pronger try and end careers. And when I'm in the mood for some laughs I dust off a copy of Old School, use it as a plate for a greasy pepperoni hot pocket, and attempt to swallow a Kings game.

This usually ends in something awful.


The lack of TV coverage for Los Tiburones down south results in staring at this here computer screen for two and a half hours listening to Sharks games on the radio. Oh and I also get the distinct pleasure of watching five minute highlights courtesy of nhl.com roughly two hours after the game ends. Lately, these videos have pleasantly consisted of a peppering of opposing teams scoring chances being denied, sandwiched in between a hungry Sharks team attacking the net and chomping down a win.

Ed. Note: Apologies for all the food references, I've run out of hot pockets and blown all my money on cheap liquor and cheaper women. But I digress.

Lately my friend Alfred has been kind enough to lend me his Slingplayer on nights he isn't using it, so I've been able to catch a majority of the games live. God bless his teal heart.

The list of crew members are as follows (6/6/08):

Bleedinteal12: My friend who lives in San Jose. He has like one post on the site (you really would be better off not clicking this link) but still has administration privileges that may or may not be revoked by the time I post this. Most of his coverage consists of drunken rants to yours truly on the phone.

Alfred: Alfred joined We Bleed Teal during the end of the 2007-2008 season. He has played hockey for 10 or so years (honestly I'm just guessing at that number) and provides analysis of the games whenever he isn't being productive.

Mr. Plank: Jason Plank is the supreme dictator of We Bleed Teal and loves the San Jose Sharks. He also enjoys watching sunsets (as long as there is a bottle of Jameson present) and short walks on the beach.


Hope you enjoy your stay here. Go Sharks.

Welcome To We Bleed Teal

What can you expect? So glad you asked.

-> Analysis of the San Jose Sharks Hockey Club and their quest to bring home the Stanley Cup
-> Incoherent ramblings
-> Passion for NHL 08 on XBOX 360, possibly the greatest hockey game ever created (besides NHL '94 for Sega Genesis which will hold the proverbial crown for the rest of time)
-> Related Youtubulars



-> Brash statements
-> Witticisms
-> Perfect punctuation from yours truly, questionable commentary by the other crew-members
-> Random bouts of inebriation
-> Sharks, Sharks, Sharks
-> Interviews with the players (well, we're currently working on that one)
-> Long lists
-> Abrupt endings